street tales of love and lust and possible misinterpretations

asking for 'what' ?

thank you Vignesh (from Dindugal) for sending us the link and also for directing us to more such film clips!

tamil to english translation coming up: anyone wants to volunteer to translate?

and Ramyah Veer from the BN Chennai mailing list has sent this in :

"The perpetrator apologises to the male actor for misbehaving with the actress.But the actor drags the culprit near the actress and makes him brush his hands against the actress's hands.The actor didn't stop with that.

I think it would be better if i explain the dialogue in direct voice.

The actor to the perpetrator:

"Are you satisfied with this or u want something else from her?Are u behind her skin,flesh?If this is all what you want, then go get it from a meat shop."

Now the actor takes a complete look at the actress(top to bottom) and starts his next set of dialogues

Between the actor and the actress:

Actor : I don't find any saree or innerskirt.You are just wearing a panty.

Actress: This is called 'shorts'.

Actor : For you girls it is 'shorts'.For us(men), it is a 'panty'...... Then I dont find any blouse or duppatta.You r just wearing a bra.

Actress:This is called 'Sleeveless'

Actor: For you girls it is 'Sleeveless'.For us, it is a 'bra'..... Wearing all these for letting enough air get into ur underarms or showing off the body piercing done on ur navel or a tattoo on ur thighs .... is this a product exhibition or body exhibition(i.e. show-off)?You girls wear dresses in a way that let others count the moles on ur body and then complain if a perpetrator touches ur body..... This has become a job for u all... Just know this. God created men for women and women for men...Main purpose is that a woman is for man's need and a man for woman's need.God has created all of us in huge but it is us who has to be disciplined.Disciplined in the sense being true to one person in ur life.If u feel that u want to live with only one man forever,then showoff to him alone.But if you showoff ur body to everyone,then every men will want/desire to live with you only.

(The crowd applauds the actor by making some comments)

Actor:If you dress like a traditional Indian woman wearing a saree with whole body covered up, then men will treat u more than a woman ... they will treat u like Godess Mahalakshmi....

The actor then ends the dialogue by asking her to leave in a contemptuous manner.

This is what the entire scene conveys .

************

send a garment you wore when you were sexually harassed on the street.

I never ask for it.

I never ask for it.

I never ask for it.

I never ask for it.

I never ask for it.

Action Heroes (source NDTV)

An incident of alleged molestation in Assam's Halflong town would have passed unnoticed, but for a girl who decided to take on an entire group of army personnel.

Thanks Maya Kovskaya, Jenelle Eli for sending us the link.

Got a story on how you dealt with street sexual harassment? Share it here. At Blank Noise we do not prescribe or suggest a formulaic response to street sexual harassment. We gather and archive your stories/ your testimonials and learn from your experience. We do not suggest you apply one person's reaction to your experience; but instead the Action Heroes blog focusses on how common and everyday these experiences are; and that it is important to respond, be pro active towards the issue rather than simply ignore it.

We also invite you to look at dealing with street sexual harassment in ways that do not necessarily always need aggression but sometimes wit? humour? a non defense approach perhaps?
Got a story? Tell us. Be an Action Hero.

your attention please:

• report here if you experienced it. tell us how you dealt with it. would you deal with it any differently today?how did you become an action hero in your own eyes.

• report here if you witnessed it. tell us what made you help someone. tell us if you didn't come forward to help and why.

• report here if you're male/ man/ boy/ guy and thinking about the issue of street sexual harassment.

about "blank noise guy" : street sexual harassment is as much a male issue as it is one concerning women because it is influenced by male behaviour, attitude and expression. With this thought we announce "Blank Noise Guy" : inviting males to share their experiences on being in public.

Thoughts on the body, boundaries, behaviours
[flirting, 'teasing' , 'harassing',' intimidating', 'having fun', 'just looking'?]

It could range from the fear of being seen as a perpetrator; how you
approached a female stranger (if you ever did); being attracted to a stranger and what you did or witnessing harassment and introspecting on your response. Welcome.

This bike belongs to Vivek from Jaipur

About 2 years ago, Vivek Kakkar from Jaipur met Blank Noise members in Delhi at a meeting. He enthusiastically participated by translating several testimonials ( of the blogathon) to hindi. This was for a Blank Noise street action in Delhi that evening.

He took back Blank Noise stickers to Jaipur and had put this one on his bike at first . He says that the sticker got washed away in the rain but he made another one- the one you see on his bike!

He sent us this photograph about a year ago. Apologies for sharing it so late, but we felt that the time has come to talk about how men have built Blank Noise over the years.

BN: When did you decide to put a Blank Noise sticker on your bike?
Vivek: I read that sticker first and thought where i can stick this, then i thought these things should come into view so i put it on my bike, i took my bike to normal places like juice shops, bakerys, malls, cigratte shops etc, where i use to go as lots of young people and my friends are present, my friends asked me why did i have sticked unwanted instead of wanted as in sticker rest things were in background and it was in bold letters, then i said , read it fully, then i asked them what u feel about eve-teasing, your views, why we stare, comment etc, then some said its bad habit, lots of things one question which was raised everywhere was , about clothes which girls wear.

BN: did they ask you why you wanted that sticker on your bike?
Vivek: Yes some asked and I replied that lot of us stick different stickers which are of no use and i sticked it becaused it looked different and may be other can stick some inspiring stickers

One friend said yeh kya lagaya hai kuch acha lagata.
(What have you put on your bike?! you should have put something better).
I said dear sticker bhe hai( it's a sticker too) and also awareness for people .


BN: Did anyone get annoyed or irritated with the sticker on your bike?
Vivek : No , no one was angry or annoyed with sticker, not even my family, second one raised little less as people abbrevated it to fifferent menaing and then i explained them about it and about this project, its aim etc


BN : Why do you react to eve teasing? what makes you want to address 'eve teasing'?
Vivek: I react to eve teasing because i think its not a good thing and people who do so must understand that it gives a wrong message to society about yourself and what you will feel if such incident happens by chance with female members of their family. i will think hundred times before doing such things. And i want to address this issue because i feel it a problem these days , not many peole are working on this and above all i respect all females

BN: but what happens lets say if you find a girl attractive...you dont see her as a mother. sister. etc..you are a stranger to this girl how would you try to get to know her? or how would yo look at her? what would happen?when does it become 'eve teasing'? when does it become 'flirting'? or feeling attracted to 'flirting'? or feeling attracted to someone and expressing it?
Vivek : If i find a girl attractive and I'm stranger to this girl , if I have to look from my perspective I would not try to get to know her, but if i had to know her then will probably find out some decent way and if im not able to find out decent way then will not try to know her, i would look at her as a normal girl and will ignore. it becomes eve teasing when people find girl attractive and say some comments and try to touch her or roam around her, follow her without any reason.


BN :How did you start thinking about eve teasing?
Vivek : When i read into newspapers , heard about teaisng incidents and when one happened with my friend i started thinking about eve-teasing. I noticed while growing up that people unnecessarily comments on girls, ladies in markets, in parks, people following girls, etc

I have seen..people harrasing girls in buses, making comments on roads in traffic and some when sitting in malls making fun and comments on girls their ...


BN :Do your friends eve tease?
Vivek :few of them, remeber i once asked u about it that one of friend stares a lot , what i should i do?
I discussed with him a lot, made him understand many a times, then said look, what if someday u r trapped and public smashes u, or if ur sister faces such things what will u feel, slowly slowly he started understanding but still some problem is there but i will pull out that too

Vivek , age 24 , is based in Jaipur. He is a member of Pravah since 2007.
He is enthusiastic about the idea of a Blank Noise Jaipur

(we have been receiving emails from Jaipur- its time to call for a national meet up and get you in touch with each other! keep them coming!)

If you're male and have gotten into discussions with men about street sexual harassment or eve teasing- do write in to us at blurtblanknoise at gmail dot com. We would love to hear from you

From an 'ex- eveteaser'

1. Your - age- background
Age: 29
Software Engg

2. why do you refer to yourself as an ex 'eve teaser'. what did you do?
I have given up on eve teasing. I got introduced to you by narrating my story.

3. what is eve teasing to you- what was the range of things that you did
Mostly caressing the bottom or thighs in crowded places. Rubbing private parts against the butt.

4. when and why did you stop?
Because I was punished in public.

5. how do you approach a woman stranger now? if you find her attractive?
I am married now. So no question of approaching. I have lot of friends who are girls.

6. how did you hear about Blank Noise
When I was browsing regarding eve teasing.

7. did you discuss being an 'eve teaser' , strategies and ways with your male friends?
No I used to operate alone. To my friends I was a decent guy.

8. did anyone except the woman who experienced it, really know that you could violate someone?
No. I had a decent image.

9. do you feel that 'teasing' to an extent is ok? if yes then where do you draw the line?
No it is not acceptable in any form or shape.

The answers are not meant to be seen as absolutes or solutions. It is but 1 person's experience. I thank him for sharing.