I had a very beautiful serene experience at the event. I was inspired by my friend Vijji to make it for this. I value freedom of expression and being, for each person- and the cause of women claiming public spaces is very important and relevant in today's otherwise constricting to death and hostile atmosphere in public spaces.
I have spent time occasionally in Cubbon park in the recent years.. and all through my time trying to nap a part of me kept asking me why i didn’t do this more often. I have like minded company to do it, I enjoyed the park, I love Bangalore, I love nature and contemplation - but what holds me back?
So in all these thoughts I didn’t completely fall asleep. I wanted to real bad.. but my mind did not fully let go. Maybe it was all too exciting or that the other people in the vicinity (not from our group) did play on my mind.
So I was able to relax my body in spite of my alert buzzing mind- I was aware of random men walking and sitting real close to where I was lying down and I did check on them occasionally. I realised they were simply curious but their cameras made me very uncomfortable (in hindsight). I was also aware of a few men in the distance.. just standing in the thickets.. staring ahead.. maybe not even looking at us ( but my mind would take off like an alarm - psycho masturbator.. flasher.. gross... ) . When stranger women, couples or families crossed I felt absolutely at ease , even if the family maybe disapproving.
At the end of it I just lay watching my breath, the leaves and birds and was able to get my mind off the transitioning crowds around me. I could enter solitude and did not force myself to fall asleep. As I think of this experience now, I realise that my years of conditioning and experience probably did not allow me to relax. And to truly occupy the space fully.. is not just to be able to do it physically (which is a great step forward) but also to do it mentally and emotionally. Which I wasn’t able to do completely . And that is an important insight for me.
And that inspires me to be a part of the next event, or take some naps by myself.. as a process to allow myself to occupy and inhabit a space fully.
Thank you for creating this beautiful space.. I was very moved by the idea as well as the way you held the space with a cool groundedness. I am so glad to be a part of this.
